Something I shared at church today

A few weeks ago I wrote out some thoughts about Mother's Day. I sent them to my pastor to read since I shared briefly last Mother's Day. He said he wanted me to share again this year. So this is what I shared this morning ...

On November 29, 2006, I became a mother for the second time to a beautiful baby girl we named Abigail Graceland. She weighed 6 lbs., 14 oz. and looked just like her big brother, Benjamin. Only, Abby died just hours before she was born, during the early stages of labor. So, Mother's Day is a bittersweet day for me. Bitter because I should have a 17 month old little girl by my side today that is not here. Sweet because I have a 4 year old little boy by my side today who is.

Mother's Day is a celebration of motherhood, but for some it is a painful reminder of what they don't have. Whether due to miscarriage, stillbirth, death of a child at any age, or even abortion, many women hurt deeply on Mother's Day over the loss of a child. Some mothers hurt today because their children have chosen a life of drugs or abuse or have simply rejected them. Let's not forget the motherless children, young and old, who hurt because they are missing their mothers today. Some because their mothers have died and others because their mothers are merely absent from their lives. There is one last category of those who hurt on Mother's Day that is often overlooked. Those who long to be mothers but are struggling with infertility or even those who are single and long to be married so they can start a family, but are forced to wait. Needless to say, for many, Mother's Day is a painful time. A lot of these women choose to avoid going to church on Mother's Day for this reason. And the brave who do come often feel isolated and invisible in their pain. It is important that we remember those who are missing their children or mothers today, for whatever reason, and those who long to be mothers but feel like that day will never come. We remember and honor you today.

When my daughter died, the Lord gave me many verses to comfort me. One of them was Psalm 56:8, "You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book." To know that my tears were important to God meant so much. I also remembered that Jesus was a man of sorrows and acquainted with the bitterest grief. He knew my pain and longed to comfort me. But Isaiah 53:3-5 says, "We turned our backs on Him and looked the other way when He went by. He was despised, and we did not care. Yet it was our weaknesses He carried; it was our sorrow that weighed Him down. And we thought His troubles were a punishment from God for his own sins! But He was wounded and crushed for our sins. He was beaten that we might have peace. He was whipped and we were healed."

God lost His own Son. At times that didn't comfort me. I thought, "He is God! He can handle it. I'm human. It's different. He got his Son back in 3 days. I have to wait a lifetime!" It's just not a fair comparison. But a close friend, who also lost a child at birth, made a very good point that proved that God does know the deep pain of losing a child -- every person who rejects Him is lost to Him forever -- a precious child who will be separated from Him for eternity. I will see my daughter again and there will be no more tears and no more pain on that day. Those who reject Him He loses forever.

No matter what your situation, God sees your tears. He knows your heart. He hears your pain. And He longs to comfort you. Lamentations 3:31-33 says, "For the Lord does not abandon anyone forever. Though He brings grief, He also shows compassion according to the greatness of His unfailing love. For he does not enjoy hurting people or causing them sorrow." He loves you and wants to care for you. I pray today that you will give your pain and sorrow over to Him and allow Him to be your strength.